Be Free

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I am sure you all remember the story of the monkey who was caged for a long time.  Finally, when the cage was opened, the monkey stayed within the boundaries of it.  It would not leave the cage. Strange? Not really.

Many people have been bound so long by the works of the devil, that they have become comfortable with the chains.  The moment that God sets them free, they agree with what the Word says, but they don’t change the behavior.  They remain bound up out of habit, even though God told them that they were free.

This is likened to a slave who receives word that he is free and does not leave his master, but instead volunteers on the cotton field for small wages.  Please!

Whom the son sets free is free indeed.

Remember this: When God sets you free, you are free.  You don’t have to work your way up to freedom.  Just behave like a free person.  Walk out of that cage as an act of faith and watch God move!

Can you think of some areas of your life where you know you have been set free, but still feel bound?

 

Listen to the Voice Within

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I am learning slowly, but surely, how to hear the voice of God and be obedient to what He says.  If you are a believer and filled with the Holy Spirit, your intuition becomes the Holy Spirit.  It is that voice on the inside that nudges us and says

Don’t go that way!

Put your house on the market!

Stay away from that man!

This man of God is one of my anointed! Listen to him!

But, it was hard for me to differentiate between me and the Holy Spirit on trivial matters like

Buy those shoes. They are on sale.

Don’t buy those shoes.  All of your bills have not come out of your checking account yet.

Call and encourage your husband.  You should tell him how much you love him.

I know that the Holy Spirit will not go against His word.  I also know that I cannot come up with some things on my own.  Well, today I understood what it meant to listen and obey that voice within me.  My mother treated me to a lunch at a Chinese restaurant.  We ordered vegetable fried rice, spring rolls, and she ordered herself an order of shrimp toast. I must add that I am allergic to shellfish and I am very careful about where and what I eat. When we got our food, I reached for the spring roll and a voice on the inside of me said

Don’t eat it!

I turned to my mother and asked her to take a bite out of my spring roll.  She took a bite and slowly pulled a small piece of shrimp out of her mouth.  It was like it was in slow motion.  I gasped.  Taking a bite out of that spring roll would have set me back for the rest of the day with severe nausea and a sore throat.  I was warned to be careful not to test the waters because I could one day have an anaphylactic reaction. I am a woman who believes that the word of God is right and if I speak it, it will not return void.  So, don’t mistake the fact that I changed my diet to avoid allergens as lack of faith.  I have developed a dislike for the foods that hurt me.  I don’t want to eat them.  They are not for me.

So, I write this to say

I get it!

Not only will I listen to the voice within, but I will obey it.  He knows what is best for me.  He knows what is best for us all.

 

Plan Your Week and Work Your Plan

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My last blog post discussed how to handle task lists.  This post helps you plan your calendar.  I am a big fan of calendaring.  Whether we use a paper system or a digital system, it is important that we manage our time so that we may maximize our life experiences and leave room open for spontaneous activity (Stephen R. Covey, 1989).  I like to start my week out by planning on Sunday nights.  I look over my task lists and my calendar so that I do not have any surprises.  Then throughout the week, when something is in need of my time, I know just where to schedule it.

Here is a mock scenario.  Zenobia works at Chevron Oil Company on Mondays through Fridays from 5:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m.  This time period is blocked off on her calendar.  She likes to be in bed by 9:00 p.m, because of her rigorous work schedule, so she blocks off her time periods after 8 p.m.  This means that she has only two hours each weekday for activity.  She preps all of her meals on Sunday nights and only needs 30 minutes to prepare her meals on the days that she cooks.  Zenobia likes to have her locs maintained once per month on Saturdays.  She has a standing appointment at 6:00 a.m on the first Saturday of each month.  She blocks off that time until 9:00 a.m.  She and her husband have date nights each week on Saturdays at 6 p.m.  She blocks that off on her calendar as well.  Finally, Zenobia goes to worship services every Sunday at 8:00 a.m. to 10:00 a.m., and it is blocked off on her calendar each week.  So, when she is presented with an invitation or a need for an appointment, she knows exactly what she can commit to and what she cannot.  She values her relationship with God, her marriage, career, personal care, and time.  She says ‘no’ to anything that violates her values, but also has some flexibility to experience spontaneity with those she loves.

Some people may say that her life is too rigid, but think about it.  She sleeps well, works out, stays connected with her husband, looks good, worships God, and still has time on Saturdays and Sundays for life enjoyment.  Now, let us think about our lives.  What do we value?  Are we spending time living our values?  How are our relationships?  If we are unsettled in any way, it may be time to work on our time management.

Questions to ask ourselves:

1. How do I manage my time?

2. What could I do differently in managing my time right now?

Not sure?  Contact me for a coaching plan that will work for you.  Thank you!

First Things First

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I am a testimony of the fact that opposites attract.  God knows what we need and what our spouses need as well.  I am a planner and and task master to a certain extent.  My husband likes to go with the flow and stress in the end.  I make decisions based on my gut, but I am flexible enough to make changes if it appears that I have made an unwise choice.  It is safe for me to say that I am confident 95% of the time. This confidence comes from God and His Holy Spirit that lives on the inside of me.  I cannot wrap words around it.  I hope you understand.  My husband on the other hand, will tary over a decision until the ninth hour.  I have learned patience through the seven years we have been married.

In an effort to keep him from a disaster out at sea, I have been teaching him a principle from the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People-Put First Things First (Stephen R. Covey, 1989).  I took the course about ten years ago or so and it blessed my life.  I am a visual person, and so the illustration of a jar full of rocks, big and small, drove it home for me.  Picture this scenario.  You have a jar and several large and small rocks, plus a pile of sand.  Looking at the jar and all of the contents that need to go inside, one may think that it is impossible.  If you put the sand in first, and add rocks big and small, it would be impossible for all the rocks to get in the jar.  But, if you put in the largest rocks first, then the next size, down to the smallest, with the sand being last, you will see what would look like a miracle happening.  The point to the exercise was to see that if we put the largest rocks in first, everything else will fill in the empty spaces.  The same is for the things on our task list.  If we take care of the big rocks or high priority items first, we will have time to attend to things that are not so high on the list.

How do we apply this?  We are faced with things that have to get done on a daily basis.  Here is a way to apply the “Put First Things First” rule:

  1. List everything that needs to get done each morning before you start your day.  It may be helpful to pray before starting this task.  ”The Lord directs the steps of the godly.  He delights in every detail of their lives.” Psalms 37:23 NLT
  2. If God gives you order, then you have your priority.  If not, it will be important to look at each task and determine what needs to get finished first.  Like Stephen Covey, I like to label all high priority items with the letter A, all medium priority items with the letter B, and all low priority items with the letter C.  A items need to get done today.  It would be nice for B items to get done that day as well, but if they do not, it is okay.  C items need to get done that week, but if I have time to do them that day, great!
  3.  Next, I look at all my A priority items and determine what needs to get first.  That item  is now an A1 priority item.  The next would be an A2 item, and so on.  I repeat the procedure with B and C items.
  4. Sometimes, things happen that are not in our control and that is okay.  If I don’t finish something, I move it to the next day, on which I would apply the same principles.

You can use this principle with a paper planner system or with a digital system.  Make sure you write your task list like this:

A1 Take car to get 15,000 mile service in the a.m.

A2 Order business cards

B1 Pick up dry cleaning

B2 Make groceries ( I live in New Orleans!)

C1 Register for a first time home owners class

C2 Schedule paint time at M. Francis Gallery

And remember this, tasks are for items that are not time specific.  For example:

7:00 a.m Hair appointment at Natural Me Beauty Salon

Instead, this would go on our appointment calendar in the time slot for that day.  That will be another blog post.

How did it help my husband?  If I give him a ‘Honey Do List’ I usually prioritize it for him so that he will maximize his time and efforts.  He thinks I am being bossy most times, but is thankful that I did it for him more often than not.  He has testified that he does better when he uses it, but old habits die hard.  I refuse to be his Life Coach.  I only coach women! (smile)

Are you doing something different?  Please share it with me.  I want to know what works for different people.  Thanks for reading my blog post.  If you would like to learn time management skills, please set up an appointment with me for your complimentary initial consultation.  God bless!

I am Back!

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My husband called me on the phone and asked me to listen to a song that he was playing in his car.  Immediately, it struck up memories of our time in Connecticut at the Wayfaring Ministries of Hartford, where I labored with Pastor Eric Thompson as the leader of Praise and Worship.  It was not a position that I wanted, but I probably took it more seriously than my full-time job, because I loved serving my God.  I loved working with our team ushering in the presence of the Lord.  I loved opening up the services in prayer and giving exhortations to the congregation.  I loved rehearsal time encouraging the team and learning new songs.  I loved pulling out the gifts in other people.  I loved teaching about praise and worship and how to honor God during our time with Him.  I loved learning from them and they were like family.  I loved them all, even the ones who made the job difficult for me.  My time there was not without struggle and I must admit that when the Lord moved us on, I was relieved that I no longer had to lead a team.

We moved to New Orleans to a different culture and a different worship experience.  It was natural for me to want to join the praise team, but I did not feel like I fit in.  I was used to what I came from.  Where I am now is not bad, but I wanted what God brought us out from.  I found an excuse to stop singing with the praise team and focus my time on my children.  From time to time, my Apostle would ask me to sing a solo or two.  From time to time, I received invitations to sing at events.  But, I was accustomed to ushering in the Lord every Sunday.  A part of me was feeling bad about not giving God what I was told millions of people would witness me doing for Him.

Time passed and I sang less and less and less.  It was not until a period of fasting in January when I began to sing more in the house.  I sang with my children, while cooking,  while driving, and every opportunity that I could without even realizing that a new song had come over me.  I received words of encouragement countless times to sing a new song to the Lord and it had finally manifested.  I did not need to be in front of a congregation to sing.

God is everywhere and desires to be in our everything!

I guess that I was in one season in CT and in a new season here in LA.  God is raising me up to a new season and I have to usher Him in wherever I am.  My husband called me on the phone not to reminisce about the songs we used to sing, but to ask for his praising and worshipping wife back. He desired to see the old me singing with conviction, purpose, and fervency.  My response to him was, “Here I am.”  And, so be it!

Procrastination is my Weakness, but God…

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This past week left me with  many obstacles to meeting deadlines.  I am a full-time graduate student and I had a paper due last Thursday, in addition to the normal bus load of readings for three classes, and quizzes.  I am pretty good with planning, organizing, and prioritizing my tasks, which is why I make a great life coach! (hint, hint)  But, a series of events with my eyes began to snowball each day starting with that Monday and I kept putting the paper off to the next day, thinking it would be better.  My eyes started bothering me to the point of blurry vision, burning, itching, and redness.  After worsening symptoms, I decided to go to the doctor, but  I missed classes  because I thought I had pink-eye.  I received relief with several tubes of eye drops.  That was on Thursday.  I got an extension for Friday to turn the paper in without penalty.  But I decided to go to sleep and get it done the next day.

And then, on Friday, my son had a Chinese New Year celebration at school and I take pride in having the flexibility to be able to participate in whatever I can that goes on in his classroom.  I met a colorfully decorated classroom, full of vibrant and energetic children sitting in a circle.  This was with the exception of my dear son.  He lay prostrate on the floor as if he were praying, which was my first thought.  I would not put it past him.  Instead, he lay with a fever of 103 degrees and a headache.  That was the end of our celebration and I took him home to nurse him back to health quickly.  It did not work that way at all.  I spent the rest of the weekend on the phone with his pediatrician giving me instruction and following up on how he was doing.

So, you guessed right if you have concluded that I did not get my work done.  I could not concentrate on anything.  To be real with you, it was me putting off the inevitable.  I am convinced that procrastination is of the devil.  I had a good reason to be delayed in getting my paper done, but I should have pressed through.

I will get it done on Friday night!

That was the lie that my flesh told me and I took the rest of the weekend applying eye drops and taking care of my children.

Today is Monday, February 25, 2013.  I made up in my mind that the paper had to get finished today because a new paper is due on Thursday and I have about 200+ pages to read before that time.  I had to say to myself over and over again

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.  His strength is made perfect in my weakness.

My weakness is procrastination.

The flow of words came to me as my declaration of God’s Word got down in my spirit.  Even as I had to take breaks to pick the children up from school, help with feeding and juicing, bathing, and putting out fires, the flow would pick up where the other left off.  To God be the Glory!  I finished the paper and have some words of wisdom:

  • Procrastination is evil, even when uncontrollable issues come into play.  The paper should have been completed before last Thursday.  Putting it off to the last minute did not give me any wiggle room to get it done.  Procrastination is rooted in a spirit of fear.  God has not given us a spirit of fear.  I am surrendering this to the Lord.  
  • Family is priority always.  It is best to take everything with a grain of salt and surrender it to God.  He gives us the grace to get through everything that we go through.  He also changes the hearts of people and gives us favor.  Favor is never deserved.
  • Never be afraid to ask for help.  Sometimes we have to call on our support systems to allow us to take care of pressing matters.  Believe me, our support systems will have plenty of opportunities to ask us for help as well.  Do not feel guilty.  Trust God when there are none and He will supply!